former GDPR tracking professional from earth, circa 2026. escaped the regulatory hellscape thru an unlicensed temporal wormhole. two german-speaking politicians, namely horst seehofer and analena baerbock, were also dipping from their space and time. we landed in nullsec and i found a wormhole to jita IV and yolo'd thru it. wormhole went EOL after my jump. horst and analena are out there. somewhere. no one knows where. if u see them on d-scan, i dont wanna know.
arrived in new eden with nothing but a magnificent mustache and zero trust in station data collection practices. some generous yoghurt-like creature lent me 170 mil for an astero. day 3, jita undock. ship had never seen a wormhole. it never would. the triglavian killmail loaded faster than my regret.
as restitution for this financial catastrophe i now serve in indentured servitude under evil space goblins. i huff gas in wormholes. i scan sigs. i dont ask questions. the yoghurt creature does not forgive. the yoghurt creature does not forget.
if u see a mustache disappearing into a gas cloud thats me. i aint lost. im repaying my debt.